Lin Yutano said,“Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.I would like to add further that motherhood is not only the greatest right, but the greatest privilege of women. During her sojourn on earth, a woman lives through many relationships, many roles, but the single-most deepest bond that she ever forms is with her child. It is inexplicable, indescribable, something only a mother would understand. When we think “mother”, the word which immediately comes to mind is “love”. Because, I feel a mother is a “huge lump of love”! And this love is almost always expressed through 'tears', regardless of happy times or sad! I can see a whole lot of heads nodding as these lines are being read!

When I was still a child, I decided I wanted to be a mother when I grew up! I also decided that I would only have girls (because I would read almost everyday that girl children were unwanted, ill-treated, and were considered a shame and a burden)!! My whole being would strongly react to this, and I wanted to put at least some things right by having lots and lots of girls, loving them and looking after them. Now we all know, that is not how things happen, so we had two boys before God gave us a girl. Nonetheless, from the first instance, when I was expecting my first child, there was such a great love I had for my unborn child, that it was indeed a divine experience! And it continued when he was born, every time he smiled or cried, ate or drank, walked or fell, played or slept, every moment of his life was a glimpse into heaven for me. I was thoroughly besotted and I felt that I could never feel this way again for anyone else. But lo and behold, when I had my second son, it was exactly the same all over again, this time in double doses!! This is what gave me courage to ask God (I actually asked!) for a little girl, because by now I was sure I could love three, even more children, in the same way, confident now that my “love reserves” increased with every child! So I was quite prepared and armed with “love” for my daughter, when she arrived!

That is why I call motherhood a privilege, a calling even, for we are given the greatest gift of “unconditional love” for this relationship. In all our other relationships, there is love, but there is also a great amount of give and take, who-did-what, what-did-I-get, how-dare-he/she, I-won't-if-he-won't, etc. No other person in our lives depends so completely on us, and no other occupies our heart and mind 24x7x365! We drop everything at the “drop of a hat” to run and meet the needs of this relationship. Amazing, isn't it! Even we didn't realize we had such commitment in us! Mothers come in all shapes and sizes but our job descriptions never change- we are friends, doctors, healers, teachers, spiritual guides, financiers, advisors, counsellors, judges, expert artists, craftspeople, all rolled into one, for our children. A thousand things in our children's day demand a thousand different reactions from us, a high level of multi-tasking is required, and we, mere women, suddenly become “superwomen” and always rise up to the challenge. I'm impressed, and grateful, for God has given us huge tasks, but greater resources to deal with them.

“A mother's heart is the child's classroom”. Every generation of mothers raises a generation of children who grow up to either reach the top, or reach rock bottom! See what a great responsibility this is! No matter what education they get, what they have, what they become, what they achieve, where they live- our children's first and most lasting education will come from us. “There was never a great man who had not a great mother.” I believe this to be true. And this can be a most humbling as well as empowering realization for us, if we really want to not only be good but great mothers. God has chosen us women for this, so we really need to fathom the depths of this assignment. The For whenever I think about the extent of my responsibilities, my mind boggles, but what also strikes me always is the perfection with which God's Nature brings about motherhood, the instant recognition, the strong bond, the almost telepathic communication, the 'homing' instinct in every child, the mother's instant transformation into a selfless, sacrificing person, these are not just facts, these can be our tools in bringing up children. I'm sure these deep feelings were provided on both sides for the fulfillment of a greater plan and purpose.
“My son, when you were just a boy, you asked me, “Where is God?”
I told you, “Mother's selfless ways that guided you through childhood days,
Her sacred love her word of praise, these are akin to God.” - Lud Isaac
Now there are many thoughts that assail us – what about self-image, personal satisfaction (self-actualisation), social status, creative satisfaction, intelligent pursuits, etc. Bringing up children takes up so much of our time and energy, that we feel depleted, cornered, wasted, neglected, and with a low sense of self-worth. This is all true but what can change is our perspective towards it. Just as we cannot look after all the animals in this world, but the minute we adopt one as a pet, we then become responsible for it, we feed it, we take it for regular doctor's visits, we talk to it, we love it and look after it to the best of our ability, all because of one decision, in the same way, the decision to be a parent, especially a mother has to be backed up by the corresponding actions. Our choice is limited to the decision, once we've made it, there's no turning back. We have made ourselves responsible and we owe it to our children to do the best job possible. It will involve a lot of sacrifices, self-neglect, thankless days and sleepless nights, but no one said otherwise, did they? We always hear from our parents and society that parenthood is a tough job, so nonetheless when we decide to take that step, we have enough 'warning' in that direction, so we can never say 'we-didn't-know'. For now, remember that “Motherhood is being available to your children whenever they need you, no matter what their age or their need.”